When I was pregnant I loved how I felt. I felt a connection with my mind, body and heart that made me want to nourish it, and in turn, myself. I started eating better, I maintained a good work out routine, and I felt wonderful. After I had B, I went through some things that just wore me down. My divorce was one thing, but more so, it was the treatment I received for my illnesses that left me feeling like a stranger in my own skin. My body looks different, feels different, my scars all apparent; but since it felt like one thing rolled into another over these last couple years, I don’t feel like I’ve had a “normal” body until recent. When I’ve been healed for a little while and have had some time to get used to the new me, I’ve got to admit; I kind of love her.
Okay, okay, I’m not that into myself, but I’m being completely serious when I say that my body is amazing, not just on the outside, but from the inside out. It has been tested and tested again and it’s a miracle I’m still here. I owe it all to this body of mine, and that’s where I completely devoted myself to…. well… myself.
As soon as I was in recovery I started thinking of ways that this was good for me. Positives. I came up with a bunch. Since then, I had a minor surgery that left me to learn to walk again on my feet due to a hard cast… in that healing time, I took it as a challenge to build my confidence. I came up with some things I’d love to share in the hopes that even if the problem is half as big as those I’ve mentioned, you can apply some of these tips and feel whole, grounded, and happy with yourself.
It wasn’t until I fell in love with my body, mind, and self, that I began to understand and appreciate everything else around me. I feel that my confidence was needed to stay strong as a single mom, to stay strong working so many hours, and to take on all of the other opportunities that have crossed my path.
Let’s take a look at what worked well for me!
Hope it helps you too! 😊
1. Don’t be afraid to give yourself a pep talk. There’s really not much that embarrasses me anymore, and this definitely isn’t something that would. Almost every morning I get my chai tea, sit in front of my mirror, look myself boldly in the eyes, and say whatever it is that needs to be said to get the day started perfectly.
Sometimes it’s a to do list that I need to memorize, but then sometimes it’s just telling myself that I look good, I feel good, I am good. Either way, pep talks work amazingly to get you awake and ready to get some serious ambition.
2. Have a routine.
I know it sounds weird that a routine can help with confidence but I’ve seen it work in both realms.
As a work from home mom, I know that if B isn’t on a routine, I can’t be either, and that makes for a totally unproductive day for both of us. I’ve set him up a schedule similar to what he used to follow at daycare so that he can know what’s coming too.
I’ve also been on the other side where I didn’t have a routine for when I was leaving for work and what would be done when I returned home. Most mornings were spent in a race to get to the car in time and most nights I’d remember what I wanted to do that night as I was going to bed.
A routine gives your body and mind insight on what’s to come, and in turn, you don’t waste energy on planning, you build confidence.
3. Take a selfie
I know it sounds crazy, but there’s science to it. Looking at yourself in a good light (or with a good filter) or even a funny one will give you a little second of happiness if you like the results! If you don’t, make a change! There were so many days where I’d be having a bad morning, and while sitting in the Starbucks drive through before work, I’d snap a few funny selfies and a few I felt pretty in, and take a deep breath, and bam! Worries gone! Aha maybe not that helpful, but it still felt good to see myself happy and pretty when I felt anything but a second before.
I really hope you give this one a try, you’ll really be surprised! And you don’t have to post them either, just keep them for yourself!
4. Here’s another one that sounds crazy: workout everyday.
I know I may have just lost you, but bare with me! I think most people have a stigma with working out because they immediately picture a gym and treadmills and an excuse to get out of it, but I don’t work out that way!
No, my workout routine is something I’ve come up with while staying at home with my toddler. It consists of finding a wall, working out my legs and butt, followed by some squats with my son as my weights, and then just some good old bicycle riding cruches. You can do whatever you like, for however long you like!
Some days, it’s when Blake takes a nap, I literally hit the floor and do whatever I can for as long as I can. Some days he’s awake and I can only get 25 reps in of each before having to stop.
It’s all about just getting something in. Doing something for yourself (even if you hate working out) will refresh you and reawaken you in ways you wouldn’t think.
If it’s in the morning, you’ll feel like you can take on anything. If it’s at nap time, you’ll feel energy to get you through the rest of the day. & if you work out at night, you’ll feel like you’ve had a productive day.
Tip: if you have children, get them involved with your workout. I use B as my weight for squats everyday, and I always do them because he finds it fun and holds me to it. Try saying to to a toddler who says, “mommy, work out?” Impossible!
I know it sounds silly to think that working out for 20 minutes a day can make that big of a difference, but it’s been a game changer for me. I feel healthy, I make more health conscious decisions and I work to keep up with it. I never over exert myself, and there are surely days where I either just don’t feel up to it or just do a small set, but for the most part; this has made me a confident, body happy woman, and I hope it works for you too!
I sing my ass off. I don’t care if I’m not that good, when a song hit and feels right whether in the car or just at home, I belt it out. I always play music so I am always singing and it just works. It helps me to fuel my emotions through music and it’s pretty powerful. If a song comes on that’s not what I want, I shuffle until I find something that does.
Z always makes fun of me for shuffling my entire Spotify songs list, but that’s the only way I’ll really know what I want!
Spotify also has great mood playlists for whatever you’re feeling and their brain food play list is a must have for morning where I need to be productive.
Bonus: Surround yourself with people who want to see you happy and successful. It may sound obvious but some people just bring you down. It’s important to notice it happening and change your situation. I love having someone beside me who believes in me sometimes more than I do.
Well folks, that’s all I’ve got so far. I think confidence is taking the time to give yourself the credit you deserve. To treat your body like it’s a palace which in turn, makes you feel like you can take on the world . I’ve been knocked down more times than I’ve been helped up, but I’m so glad I’ve had to make it through what I have on my own terms. It’s given me the insight to feed and fuel myself first so I have more to give to my son and my person.😍
Happy New Year Everyone!!!
Lots of love & confidence for 2017!❤️